All American Hotdogs

All American HotDogs

When I lived in Santa Cruz I occasionally worked up in the hills and would pass this rustic dog stand. It seemed simple enough but for some reason I kept driving by without stopping. Little did I know how much this place would change by street meat life. When I finally did stop by I was struck by the contrast of what seems to a good-ole-boy redneck hot dog stand mixed with a zen garden and a gift shop of wooden trinkets. The food, however, has placed this hidden little treasure in my list of favorite dog spots that I will go out of my way to visit.

The Dog: 5/5

No amount of sauerkraut will bury this huge sucker

I don't know if I've ever seen a dog like this one, it has an uncommon plumpness that I haven't seen before. The first time I laid eyes on their sausages I remember thinking, this is truly a dog from the great nation of 'murica. The thing was about as obscene as a hot dog can get. It had a thick succulent look, swollen, flecked with spice, and tasty as sin. It's not for the faint of heart or easily intimidated, and once you've had it there is no going back.

An appropriate spread of extras

Accouterment: 4/5
For being a little hotdog stand in the mountains, this place actually has a decent spread of toppings, plus a few nice extras like jalepenos, a couple different kinds of hot sauce, BBQ sauce, and celery salt (not sure what that's about, or even how you make salt from celery....?) Nothing fancy, but everything you'll need to enjoy this plump tube of goodness to the fullest.

See that half finished dog? That's how far I got before realizing
I'd made a mistake ordering two.

Value: 5/5
Much like Jack Black's special kind of push-ups, one is all you need. I've made the poor choice of letting my eyes order for me, but eating more than one is decidedly an unwise move. A polish or hot polish dog will run you $5 (the most expensive item on the menu), and it's certainly a meal. If you're looking to splurge go for two smaller dogs, or get one with chili & cheese and top it off with a snow cone. 

Plenty of outdoor seating, especially because no one is ever here

Other: 4/5
This is a tough category as part of what makes the place so great is also what makes it a bit of a pain: it's in the middle of nowhere. Not nowhere, exactly, but on a rural stretch of highway 9 north of Santa Cruz before you get to Ben Lomond (it'll be on the right when you're going north, it comes quick so don't miss it!). The bonus is that you get a beautiful redwood forest as your backdrop. They have a little garden and the strangest curiosity shop of rustic doodads. What more could you ask for?

Overall: 5/5

An easy recommendation after eating these delicious dogs

This is one of those rare places I can't wait to take people to, but I rarely have the chance because it's so remote. I've even conspired to take a detour through Santa Cruz when traveling in California just for the chance to grab one of these dogs. It's worth a special trip and an absolute must if you are within 50 miles of Monterey Bay.

Pink's Hot Dogs

Pink's claims to be the most famous hot dog stand in the world. They may be right. Seated in the center of Los Angeles and established in 1939, it's not hard to imagine the city developed around this most epic of eateries. Its reputation certainly precedes it. The line was as extensive as the menu, with a well planned airport-security style queue, and at the awkward 3pm between meal hour at that.

Besides its obvious popularity as a heart-attack haven and tourist attraction, the next most visible feature is the menu, which is huge and terribly confusing. They apparently have 3 - 6 different kinds of tube meat (all of which are intimidating to see) in addition to dozens of toppings that come in an overwhelming number of combinations. Here's what we tried:

Notice it can't all fit in the picture.

The Dog: (5/5) If you have self-esteem issues or hang-ups about your masculinity, this isn't the hot dog for you. Some are so long I had a hard time fitting the entire thing into the frame for a photo. And they are delicious. Thick, dense, meaty, and with the needed classic snap. They have sausages and all-beef dogs, and mysterious mixes, some with spices, others with jalapeños actually embedded into the dog itself. All are delicious (except the turkey ones, which are only ok, but it's turkey and shouldn't have been a hot dog in the first place).

So Much Topping. So. Much.

Accoutrement: (5/5) One does not simply walk into Pink's and not order toppings. Especially chili. Good lord the chili is delicious. There isn't enough room to go over all the different toppings available, but you can see they certainly don't skimp on them.

Not exactly proper etiquette. Don't judge.

Value: (5/5) I won't lie, the prices at Pink's made me a skeptic. $7 dollars for a hot dog? This seemed a bit much for a souped up food cart. I over-zealously ordered two, which was a mistake. The regular 9" 'stretch' dog (in the middle above) was by itself a meal. I tried to dig into the larger 12" monstrosity, but couldn't even figure out how to pick the thing up. After taking a not so delicate bite, I realized this was a fork and knife job. Even then, I only made it half way through the dog before I had to call it quits. That's three meals out of two hot dogs, and at the end of each one I was pretty sure my arteries couldn't take another bite. Now that's value.

Jalapeños inside the dog. How is it done? How?!

Other: (4/5) They've got veggie and turkey options, outdoor seating, and their fries are unbelievable. I even saw one of the managers warn customers that a cop was coming down the street handing out parking tickets incase anyone needed to move their car. If that isn't service, I don't know what is. 

I was in the middle of a heart-attack during this photo.

Overall: (5/5) Yes the line is long and the place is super-hyped, but sometimes this is justified. Tourists to LA should certainly take the time to visit, and locals already know this is a solid place for a meal. Don't kid yourself about stopping in for a light snack, and prepare yourself spiritually for what will surely be a physical and moral assault on your sense of delicate propriety. Don't let that stop you though, everyone needs the occasional slap in the face of their soul to remind them of what real luxuries look like.

Las Delicias (22928 Lyons Avenue - Newhall, CA)

This gem of a place, hidden in a northern suburb of LA County, is one of my most frequented and favorite spots.  I don't just mean taco or hot dog places, or even restaurants, I mean most frequented spots, period.  When I lived in Santa Clarita I visited Las Delicias more frequently than I took a shower, it's that good (comments from the peanut gallery about my personal hygiene will be ignored).  The shop itself is nestled in the corner of a small strip mall about one block away from the entirely hispanic part of Newhall, CA, the staff is quite friendly and speaks little to no English; another sure sign of a taqueria's quality.

They have more than tacos of course, including a lunch buffet (that disappointingly does not include tacos), and breakfast, but the late night tacos are the real treat.  After a certain hour they only take cash, no longer charge tax, limit the menu to a few kinds of tacos, and charge $1 a piece.  
If you gesticulate wildly or speak enough Spanish to ask, they will occasionally condescend to make you a vegetarian taco with avocado and beans, but get there early as the beans don't last all night, and when they are out, they are out.


Ratings time:


The Item: 5/5
There are certain tacos in this world that make your very soul weep.  I still remember the first time I bit into a delicious carne asada taco dripping with delight from both ends of the tortilla, I felt a happiness I haven't experienced since middle school when the first days of spring hit and girls are suddenly wearing shorts again.  Think I'm exaggerating?  Try a bite, you'll become one of the many converts that frequent the place after midnight in the middle of the week.  And don't assume those tears are coming from the habañero salsa, they are tears of joy.  I went home and told my roommate about it and he said "it's just full of lipids, that's what gives meat flavor."  I looked at him dumfounded.  I told him straight up, "It wasn't lipids, these tacos were injected with rapture, smothered with good, and sprinkled with bits of kittens and rainbows."  Lipids my left foot.  Bah.  And that's just the carne asada.  The others are good too, just not quite as nice, though people like them.  Randomly, they don't have a pollo option late night.


Value: 4/5 
Dollar tacos in the late night, you can't beat it.  The only thing is that for some reason I rarely spend less that $10 when I go there.  Often this is because they are so damn good I have to eat at least half-a-dozen, and I'm usually spotting a taco or two to first time friends I'm looking to hook onto the place, but it's also because the tacos are a little on the smaller side.  That or they sprinkle them with crack.


Acoutrement: 5/5
Four different homemade salsas, cilantro, onions, grilled peppers, beans, and other...stuff.  Most of what I listed is always there, sometimes there are extras.  Occasionally they have this weird chili like mixture of left over meat products (ground beef, ham, bacon, etc.) mixed with beans, I think it's from the lunch buffet.  If you let it cool all the oil and fat congeals, but good lord it is delicious.  I personally recommend the orange salsa, it's habeñero based and worth killing for.  As a side note, the al pastor tacos also come with a slice of fresh pineapple; not only is that cool, but you should watch them deftly flick a piece of the pineapple spit with the tip off a knife and have it land directly in the middle of your taco.


Other: 3/5 
There are a couple of important things to mention in this section, the first is that Las Delicias in open until 2am.  Most nights anyway.  If it's dead or they've run out of food they'll close earlier, but if you've got a late night hankering for tacos and you're stranded in the Santa Clarita Valley, head here.  Also, they have probably some of the worst music I've ever heard in a Mexican restaurant.  It ranges the gamut of cheesy pop, to Ranchero, to repetitive electronic Latin dance beats.  There is one song in particular that has a regular high pitched beeping squeel that persists throughout the entire tune for a good 5 minutes, and they play this in the restaurant all the time.  I think it's the song they play when they want to clear out the gringos; if their tacos weren't so damn good it'd probably work.  The glaring florescent lights and late night college students do nothing for the atmosphere either.  They do, however, deliver. 


Final Score: 5/5 
Was there any doubt after my description of the tacos?  Ignore the crappy music and lack of alcohol, just go to this place and eat until you pop, then go back and get some more.  You'll thank me later.